Slump.

It is hard times for us senior year right now. I mean, ask anyone. The more you get closer to it the more harder it seems. I have seen some of my friends, and even I get into a level where you just can't stand it anymore. Sometimes it is so stressful that you just want to lock yourself and cry, or cry in front of the public. Times when you just lost faith, everyone's been there. No matter how good they fake it in the morning. I think that is the point of all of this, when no matter how worn out you are at night and you just have so much thoughts that it keeps you awake, but then you are too tired and close your eyes, and in the morning you just have to push yourself to fight again. Today, one more battle, seize the day as you had lived the day before.

They say if you want one thing, you just gotta let go of another. Sometimes, sacrifices are needed when you want it that badly. But I wonder if it's worth it to sell today for the future. I wonder if I didn't try hard enough and if I'm going to regret it in the future.

I become extremely poetic at night I guess.

What's done, is done.

"I had jumped off the edge, and then, at the very last moment, something reached out and caught me in midair. That something is what I define as love. It is the one thing that can stop a man from falling, powerful enough to negate the laws of gravity."

Moon Palace, Paul Auster

"I dont know if you’ve ever felt like that. That you wanted to sleep for a thousand years. Or just not exist. Or just not be aware that you do exist. Or something like that. I think wanting that is very morbid, but I want it when I get like this. That’s why I’m trying not to think. I just want it all to stop spinning."

-The Perks of being a wallflower

"Patrick told me that if I didn’t want to be bothered by anyone that I should just not make eye contact. He said that eye contact is how you agree to fool around anonymously. Nobody talks. They just find places to go." -The Perks of being a wallflower

"People like to say “follow your dreams”.
I think a much better saying would be ” chase your dreams down the street with arms flailing because they will be moving along much faster than you can, and do not take to time to sleep, eat, breathe, or shower while doing so. Dream chasing is similar to marathon running, but in marathons someone hugs you when you get to the end, and then you get to have a nap. No nap here. No hug. Just more marathon running." -Keltie Colleen

"I feel like one of those people who is so miserable that they can’t be around normal people, like I’ll infect the happy people." -Grey's anatomy

"When was the last time you wanted to say it all to the right person? To have it all come out right, to surprise yourself at how together you could be. When was the last time you ever met someone who made you want to give it all to them? I mean give yourself to them. Where you couldn’t express yourself enough - like you wanted to cut off one of your arms to be understood. That’s it - you would cut your head off to have someone understand you. You know how pointless that one is. You know how many times you’ve smashed yourself to bits on the rocks." -Henry Rollins

"Maybe we're not supposed to be happy. Maybe gratitude has nothing to do with joy. Maybe being grateful means recognizing what you have for what it is. Appreciating small victories. Admiring the struggle it takes simply to be human. Maybe we're thankful for the thing we'll never know. And maybe we're thankful for the things we'll never know. At the end of the day, the fact that we have courage to still be standing is reason enough to celebrate."